In the Beginning...Something Ain't Right

88/59 58 bpm. I'll always start my posts with my blood pressure and pulse rate (when I'm standing up) because the numbers fascinate me, and they are real. They reconfirm that the horrible, spacey, unreal feeling that I have is in fact, real. Plus, they tend to warn me about what kind of day I am going to have. And besides, I bought the monitor so I might as well use it.

So right now I'm feeling pretty dizzy. Probably because I took a long nap after dinner and I haven't drank water in a while, which I'd better do now, to get that pulse rate up. It hasn't ever been that low while I'm standing, in fact it's usually too high...OK I just grabbed some Clear Choice black cherry fizzy water. It's calorie and caffeine free and it tastes great. I get so sick of drinking plain water all the time. I had to run to the fridge and back because I started to brown out. That's a monkey acting up. I am so paranoid now about keeping liquids in the apartment that it's pretty much the foremost thing lingering in my mind all day-is that gallon of water in the refrigerator only half full? Should I buy another one now or wait until tomorrow? Do I have enough to fill a bottle for the gym and also have enough to drink in the morning for work AND fill another bottle to bring with me on my commute? Better buy another gallon on the way home. No wonder my skin is so clear, I drink enough water every week to fill a hotel pool.

So my basic right to stand upward, to go from point A to point B nonchalantly, thoughtlessly and freely, became compromised in August of 2009. It was the middle of the month, and I noticed I'd been feeling really tired, falling asleep with the tv on by 8pm and waking up the next morning to the alarm clock; skipping workouts at the gym because I was just too weak. I was dizzy all the time too, like the world spinning around you dizzy. I was also constantly nauseous. One day I was in Duane Reade to pick up a prescription (lucky me, I suffer from migraines too and take meds for that), and decided to take my blood pressure there. I sat down, put my arm in the cuff and pressed the button. I waited. The results flashed on the LED screen: 85/56 and I don't remember what my pulse was. I couldn't believe it, my seated BP was usually around 106/60 to 110/70. But at least this explained why I was feeling so dizzy. I was kind of freaked out...